I'm getting ready for cataract surgery Tuesday. This photo of me is how I see the world now. Everything is muted, pale, slightly blurry even with my glasses on. My cataracts have gotten so bad I can no longer read normal sized print. I can no longer drive at sunset or at night. Glare makes me blind. I can no longer walk in the late afternoon because at some point I'll have to walk west and the glare of sun hitting my eyes will blind me. I wear glasses that turn darker as the light gets brighter and corrects the maximum for cataracts, but I haven't been able to read a book in two or three years. I used to read at least one book a day, at most, three or four. Now I just can't see well enough to read at all. Things have lost their color, their vividness. The world is a paler place for me.
It's time for me to put my house in order and start spending less time watching news. This winter I will read more and work on my own writing. I will keep order in my own tiny house and worry less about the House of Representatives. We lost the house; I just assume we'll get nothing done until after the 2012 presidential election. I have lost so many things in the tiny black hole that seems to exist somewhere inside my lovely little cottage. I have to empty one space after another until I've organized things so that I can put my hands on everything I need at any given moment. I need to bring my life back into focus. If I can accomplish these things I'll probably be happier, less angry, less anxious. So, I'm making these resolutions on the brink of regaining sight.
It’s the Hardest Part of Nature
23 minutes ago